Why time is our greatest teacher

The other day my daughter asked me, “Dad, why do you always have to answer your emails?  Why don’t you just answer them all by saying, ‘OK great, sounds good’ or ‘let’s discuss’?” 

Wouldn’t that make our lives easier? No nonsense, just quick and to the point. It would certainly cut down the time I spend replying to the 300-odd emails I receive every day. But I have always been one to give people my time – if someone takes the time to mail me, then I take the time to mail them back.

The act of replying to messages is really not what’s at play here, but rather the issue of time. One of my favourite quotes comes from my oldest and dearest childhood friend, Winnie the Pooh. He was walking with Piglet one day when Piglet asked what day it was. “It is today, because yesterday has been and tomorrow hasn’t come yet,” Pooh replied.

I love this quote because it speaks to the point that we can’t change yesterday, and we have no control over tomorrow, so we should really just be….and enjoy today.

My most profound teacher in 2021 was ‘time’. The year began with the unwelcome return of my wife’s breast cancer (it is all sorted now and she is fine again). A good friend, aged 48, passed away from a brain tumour. In July, my business partner and best friend Eric was tragically killed in a plane crash. He was just 44 years old. Covid-19 deaths, riots, and the fear of loss were all around me. Holidays were canceled, global travel was off the cards, and the world was in chaos.

Eric always said that people overestimated what they could do in one year, and underestimated what they could do in 10 years. Given my experiences in 2021, I think it was enough for one year. 

With all of this happening, it would be reasonable to expect that my world would fall apart. That hopelessness would set in. That everything would feel broken and irreparable. However, in all of this, there were two paths available to me: to see the glass half-empty and to simply give up or to see the glass half-full and feel hopeful. I chose the latter.

It was from these experiences and this resolution that ‘time’ became my biggest teacher. Despite us thinking otherwise, we never have enough time. We don’t know what tomorrow will bring, so we really do have to make the best possible use of the time we have today.

To help me do that, I compiled a list of everything I was ‘making time for’. It looks like this:

1)    Family time

I aim to spend more fun, quality time with my family. I am learning to play the piano with my 11-year-old daughter and enjoyed a special moment with her when we did our first duet together at a school concert. She was my inspiration (and I apparently inspired other parents to do similar activities with their children). It really doesn’t matter how proficient (or not J) you are. It’s about doing something meaningful with your children and creating memories they will cherish forever.

2)    Time for health and wellness

I now exercise at least five times a week, monitor my eating, and try my best to eat healthy all the time (with the occasional glass of wine in between!).  My wife has been through a lot and keeps me on the straight and narrow with good, clean eating, and a healthy lifestyle.

3)    Work time

I work hard, and long hours. I have had to maintain my workforce and keep everyone motivated. We lost a giant of a man when Eric died. It all happened so quickly and lots of changes needed to be implemented. I threw myself into my work to ensure we remained a top company in our field. We worked hard, we worked smart, and most importantly, we worked as a team – a family even – to ensure that we didn’t fail. As a result, we had our best financial year ever. While this was necessary at the time, I now prioritise balancing mental and physical wellness as part of our approach to work.

4)    Naptime

Naps are great! I sometimes take a power nap to recharge my batteries for half an hour. This keeps me going into the evening.

5)    Time for learning

“Try to learn something new every day.” My Grandpa George used to say this, and I live by this motto. It doesn’t have to be something major, but just something new that you didn’t know before. For me, this includes looking up the name of a bird or a plant on Google, understanding how something works, or trying to better myself in some way. 

6)    Time for nature

I honestly believe in the power of nature and the natural world, and make time to be outdoors as often as possible. This shows up as walks on the beach, hikes, or even just a visit to a local park. There’s no better way to get my 10 000 steps a day than outside!

7)    Time to laugh

I don’t take myself too seriously anymore. By that I mean I make more time to laugh, and make more jokes, even if I’m the only one laughing at them!

8)    Time to take a few risks

Life is for living, and sometimes that means stepping out of our comfort zones. I decided to make better use of my time by taking safe risks – to feel the exhilaration of truly living. I entered a racing car team and went for my first practice session (that was an amazing rush!), opened a bitcoin account, and dabbled in this (sometimes thrilling) new market.

9)    Time to appreciate my parents

Yes, all our parents have their faults. So do we, and so our children will say about us one day when we are older. But I am making more time to appreciate my folks and learn lessons from them while I still can (even if those lessons are things I wish to do differently). My parents won’t be around forever; I’m using this opportunity to remember my heritage and appreciate it.

10) Time to be kind

I’m making more time to be interested in others, to be kind and giving, and to be generous with my time (for myself and the people that matter to me).

11) Time to just do it

Finally, I’m making a concerted effort to stop procrastinating. Time waits for no (wo)man, so if there are things I want to do, I have decided to just do them…or at least make a start. I might make mistakes along the way, but mistakes are fixable. Regrets are not.

Time really is the only thing we spend but that actually costs us nothing. It also runs out quickly, so we all need to make the most of it. 

Join me on the blog next quarter where I’ll shed a little light on why I still believe South Africa is a great place to live and work, regardless of load-shedding, politics, crime, semigration, and full-on emigration. 

May this be the best year of your life, where you make more time to do all that is truly important to you.